Best Homemade Ways To Jerk Your Pecker Off
If you like to masturbate (and who doesn’t) you're gonna love this post.
We're going to tell you the top seven most creative and homemade ways to jerk off. These will include the best manual techniques, as well as homemade devices.
Before we get to the top tips on how to masturbate, here's a few tips on what not to do.
Don't bother with trying to bone jello or fruit like melons and shit like that. They just don't work and are a complete waste of your precious time. There's just not enough tightness in any of that stuff, plus you'll be wasting delicious snacks. Trust us, we’ve been jerking off for over forty years. Second tip is to never use soap as lube. The next time you take a piss, it's gonna burn the shit out of your pee hole. If you've experienced any of that, please leave some funny stories in the comments below.
The most popular way to jerk off is manually with your dominant hand as you stroke your erect penis up and down.
This experience is greatly enhanced with additional visual stimulation or if you're gay, you can step up and enhance this manual method by adding some hand cream, such as vaseline butter or oil to your hands. Alright, so these first few methods may seem a little basic or familiar, especially if you're a seasoned masturbator, but stick with us and you're going to find out some great creative ways to masturbate.
The stranger hand method is when you sit on your hand until it falls asleep and then jerk off with that hand.
It'll feel very different and almost like someone else is jerking you off. You can also go your non-dominant hand if you're right-handed. Try jerking off with your left hand but again if you're a seasoned masturbator you've probably already used every hand you have and maybe even your feet.
The chicken wing and this works if you stick your dick between your bicep and your forearm.
For added pleasure, add the oil, butter or anything else as lubricant. The sandwich bag bang is when you put some lotion in a ziplock or plastic baggie, put it in between couch cushions or pillows and bone it. Make sure to use a towel in between the pillows or cushions so you can keep your jizz off the upholstery. We learned that the hard way. We got jizz all over the couch cushions the first time we tried it.
The love glove is achieved by using a textured glove along with some lube.
The different textures will give you a much more vagina like sensation than your hands or butt hole. The flubber glove is when you fill a rubber glove with warm water put your hand in it and then seal it tight around your wrist with rubber bands. Apply some lube and then jerk it off. This will give a nice squishy sensation like a really plus-size girl jerking you off. I almost said fat guy but I guess whatever you like. If that doesn't do it for you, maybe after applying all those tight rubber bands, it will make you lose the feeling in your hand and then you can apply the stranger hand method too.
The Fifi method is when you create a homemade Fifi out of household items like a rubber glove, a cup, a towel and some rubber bands.
Now take your favourite lotion and apply a generous portion into the opening to lubricate your beaver basher. A gummy vagina you can make it from a pool noodle, gummy bears or gummy worms, a rubber glove and some rubber bands. Stop eating the fucking gummy bears though.
If you're gay, bisexual or if you're straight and you just love your getting your ass tickled, you're going to love the dual purpose jerker offer butt fucker.
It's a modified Fifi or gummy vagina that also has a dildo attached so when you jerk off with it, it also fucks you in the ass. So, if you've tried all of these or any of these homemade sex toy methods and you're ready to step it up, the best and most reasonable way to jerk off is to buy a pocket pussy from our online store. Thank you for taking the time to read this informative blog post that we’ve put our heart and soul into. I hope you find the perfect jerking solution for you and your third leg and learn how to use these toys without doing something stupid to your self!